An acquaintance who is truly hurting asked, “…How do you see your friend that you love drowning and stand by and watch and do nothing but then shout ‘I love you.’ ” Or how do you see them drowning and say ‘call out to me that you need help and I will help you.’ ”
I say, don’t wait for help, go look for it. Ask people for what you need. People don’t always recognize that you need help. Your method of hurting is different from someone else’s. They may not have seen your hurt before. And when they do ask if you need help, say “Yes.” Don’t say “No, I’m fine.”, because they will take you for your word. If you are drowning you don’t sit back in the water and wait for help. You scream for help at the top of your lungs!
You may also need to be specific about what you need. Help can come in many different forms. A strong lifeguard, a life preserver ring, a boat, just to name a few. Don’t be mad when someone offers the help you don’t need or want, especially if you weren’t specific. How do they know that your leg is cramping and you can’t swim with the life ring?
But also keep in mind, that not everyone can help you. They may love you but they can’t help because they can’t swim. Imagine how hard it is for them to helplessly see you drown knowing there’s nothing they can do. Or there are those who just can’t swim out that far. In terms of love, you may “require a gallon of love but don’t expect that from a pint person” (credit to T.D. Jakes). They don’t love you any less, they just can give you the love that you need.