Things I Learned in my Youth


Over the years of my youth, through my own and viewing others’ experiences, I learned some things that I took as truths. By the time I was 25, I was living much of my life based on these thoughts. And while of them some are not inherently bad, at that time I didn’t have the clarity, context, or maturity to apply them appropriately. In no particular order:Things I learned in my Youth

  • Marriage doesn’t guarantee love
  • Marriage doesn’t guarantee he will stay
  • Never be financially dependent on a man
  • If you love someone, they will leave you
  • Most guys are only interested in women for their bodies and if they’re pretty
  • All guys want from me is my body
  • A man will come and save me from all my troubles
  • It’s better to be pretty than smart
  • You have to be the best to be noticed
  • If you don’t ask, you don’t get; but if you ask then you’re greedy
  • If you’re gonna do something wrong, don’t get caught
  • Everyone else is more important than me

I would spend the next 10 or so years, realizing that these were not solid truths. I would then spend the next 5-ish years learning the real truths behind them. Of course, this happens with all people as they get older. The lucky ones learn the real truths sooner and generally are happier for a longer part of their life.

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4 thoughts on “Things I Learned in my Youth

  1. I find these four particularly disturbing…

    – If you love someone, they will leave you
    – Most guys are only interested in women for their bodies and if they’re pretty
    – All guys want from me is my body
    – A man will come and save me from all my troubles

    If you could care to elaborate, you’ll be doing the world a service because I have detected each one in different women I’ve known, but never all four in one woman.

    I’d be fascinated to learn how you came by these notions and equally importantly, how you unlearned them. I think the latter will set many a good woman free from the self-imposed prison she is in.

    • I can tell you quickly that these, and probably all the points to some extent, come from not having much guidance regarding life and relationships. Without someone to tell you that the earth revolves around the sun, you will most likely conclude the inverse from your observations.

      Changing your viewpoint requires awareness and a willingness to change. Awareness comes from realizing that your viewpoint doesn’t apply to everyone. The willingness to change means that the fear of staying the same becomes greater than the fear of changing. I will expound on this in a part 2 soon, but I hope this helps you understand on a basic level.

  2. I’m looking forward to the elaboration on each of those points, because to me, as a man, some of them are patently wrong and I’m keen to see how you unlearned them and what has replaced them.

    • I had not considered elaborating on any of the items, as each of them could be a whole post on its own. But tell me which ones you’re curious about and I could provide some context to them.

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