Here is a conversation I had with myself a few weeks before I left my job a year ago. I noticed that I was not anxious about leaving the job I had been in for the last 12 years. So inquired of myself why. Continue reading
Parenting is like dancing. You, the parent, are the lead and your job is to teach and guide your child in learning the steps to the dance. But, your child controls the music.
Often, when you have finally figured out which song you’re dancing to, what the steps are to this dance, and have gotten the two of you in sync with the music, they change the song. Then you have to do it all over again.
Not to mention, one child’s tango is not the same as another’s, the next child may not play the same songs the previous one played, and they are usually playing different songs at the same time.
Frustrating? Yes, very much so.
Rewarding? When you and your child are fully in sync, moving gracefully to the music like Fred and Ginger – Yes, most definitely YES! 🙂
3 years ago, I knew that I was leaving but I didn’t know exactly when. 1-3 years is what I told my manager. By last year, I had planned to wait until 2018 – after my younger kid graduated. But came January, I knew that it was time to go.
Why did I leave the job I had for 12 years? It wasn’t the pay (I made almost 6 figures); I wasn’t stagnant in my career (I had received 3 promotions); and the benefits are awesome compared to other places. No, it was more than that: Continue reading
At the urging of a few friends, I will post Regina’s Rule #32 – The Statute of Limitations on Grievances.
24 hours. Continue reading
This isn’t about forgiveness. This is about looking at the real cause of your anger. When someone does something that really angers you, ask yourself “Why are you angry?” What is going on with you that you feel so angry about what happened? Had they done that in a different situation, might you not have been angry? So why is it bothering you now?
Here’s an example I experienced a few years back: Continue reading
Nae: There’s no state with the letter Q in it’s name.
Me: Yes, that’s true.
Ni: There’s none with the letter Z.
Ni: Oh, I thought that was an S. What about B?
Ni: That’s not a state.
Nae: It’s not?
Me: Where is Boston?
Ni & Nae: *blank stare*
Ni: No, that’s Austin.
Me: (shaking my head, thinking how I’ve failed them)
I have been reading over my past blog posts. I’ve come to realized two things:
- I write really well when I’m hurt or learning
- I was really hurting and learning back then
Does this mean that I’m not writing well now or that I’m not hurting and learning now? Well, the answer is yes and no. Because I’m human I am always learning, but I think the lessons now are not as profound as they were. Now I’m learning life’s best practices like “Oh look, there’s pitfall. How shall I avoid it?” rather than “Oh Shit! Where did that big-ass hole come from?” I can see the pitfalls now. Back then, I didn’t know what a pitfall was.
My writing is also from a different place now; a more grown up and adult place. I can deal with the hurts much better now; I know that I won’t die from them so my reaction is not so extreme. And that may not make for such exciting posts.
It also doesn’t help that my time isn’t a free as it was. I don’t have much free time to think let alone time to write. And when those juicy thoughts do come to mind, I often find that I’m too busy to write them down. Unfortunately, my older mind can’t hold onto them too long and they end up slipping away.
But as we know, life is an adventurous journey. At some point, I will be revisited by hurt and will have more learning to do. Till then, please enjoy my more mature but mellow posts.